13 Hours of Rain

When the builders laid the foundation of the temple of the LORD, the priests in their vestments and with trumpets, and the Levites (the sons of Asaph ) with cymbals, took their places to praise the LORD, as prescribed by David king of Israel. With praise and thanksgiving they sang to the LORD : "He is good; his love to Israel endures forever."And all the people gave a great shout of praise to the LORD, because the foundation of the house of the LORD was laid. But many of the older priests and Levites and family heads, who had seen the former temple, wept aloud when they saw the foundation of this temple being laid, while many others shouted for joy. No one could distinguish the sound of the shouts of joy from the sound of weeping, because the people made so much noise. And the sound was heard far away. ~Ezra 3:10-13~ A temple destroyed. Many family and friends lost in war. Jews scattered and carried off in chains. Then, a miracle. A pagan king decrees a return to the homela...

Yesterday I went to school for the last time in 2009. Students were a bit crazy. I had all these fantastic plans on how to make the day memorable for my students. For my homeroom of only 15 kids, I bought donuts and put together little "gifts" that consisted of some stationary, chocolates, and candy. They were semi-grateful, in the beginning anyway. Then I dared to do a math game entitled "Equation Persuasion". What a disaster! I guess I was supposed to plan some big party and provided them with some mindless entertainment in the form of a movie. In the end, it wouldn't have matter. Some kids would have claimed that the party was lame and the movie was stupid . At one point, one student asked, "Where's my card?" I retorted back with, "Where's mine?" No response. When the bell finally rang, a few kids thanked me for the donuts. At least someone appreciated the trouble I went through. Sadly, this seems to be the norm. The students I hav...

Portfolios to mark. Projects to grade. Exam to create. New unit to plan. Parent/Teacher phone calls to make. TI Inspire software to learn. Laundry to wash. Budget to balance. Papers to file. Family to visit. Christmas shopping to do. Tree to decorate. Parent a daughter. Be a good wife. Foster a growing fetus. Get enough sleep. Eat healthy. Exercise - what exercise? Somehow meet with God. Post the 100th time. I'm overwhelmed...

I should be marking right now. I have piles of exams on my desk and a shelf full of math portfolios to grade. But I'm not motivated. Plus I will not get them done in the next twenty minutes. Why bother? I'll blog instead. After school, our staff was asked to convene in our cafeteria for a short meeting. At the end of it, we celebrated the retirement of a colleague. Several individuals came up and spoke glowingly about this person. Thirty years of teaching. A leader in creative instructional methods. Challenged students to go beyond the status quo. Loved by staff and students alike. These were some of the many inspiring qualities of this educator. Got me wondering. My teaching career at my current school hasn't been filled with many glowing accolades. I love to teach. It is one of my passions. And I believe I do a pretty good job at it. But I am missing that personal connection with students and teachers. I do not coach. My extra-curricular involvement has been minimal due t...

She walks around the room In her adorable way With Piggy tucked under her arm And thumb in mouth. She discards her bedtime friend And grasps a block. "More?" she asks. "Yes," I respond. We create a tower together. Thoughout the morning Activities ebb and flow, I make a note of her discoveries. Star is her favorite shape. Everything is intially green. Her stuffed toys have names. The alphabet is fascinating, Especially B, M, L, W, & Y. Strawberries and grapes are yummy. Crackers are on the top shelf. Milk has a Hindi name too. Daddy and Mom are in her life. Naps are welcomed. We bake muffins together, Both in aprons. Her, mixing and dumping. Me, measuring and reading. Her, placing paper liners. Me, pouring the batter. We eat the fruit of our labor. She is "Daddy's Little Girl" for the week. But mine for this morning.

Today, I seem to be acutely aware of my blessings. I thought I'd list the ones that have been floating through my brain as of late. I have a competent and caring doctor, dental hygienist, dentist, optometrist, massage therapist, hair stylist, and aesthetician . My husband is doing an amazing job of raising our daughter while I am working full-time. She has definitely become "Daddy's Little Girl". I have a challenging and stimulating job. I REALLY enjoy teaching. I have become a master of making handouts! I will miss my work when I return to full-time parenting (but will gladly take on the role of homemaker again). Today, God was lightening my workload in tangible ways. My Educational Assistant volunteered to dump out my recycled paper box, my colleague's substitute teacher tutored a few of my weak students, an intern taught one of my classes, and we went out for supper tonight. By God's grace, we have enough finances to pay all our bills, fill our fridge with ...

It is report card time at many schools and I know of several teachers and students who dread this day with every fibre of their being. One group of students that are often filled with a large amount of anxiety are the "high achievers." Specifically, they are afraid of receiving grades that are not "high" by their standards. I have encountered these types of students numerous times in my career. And I believe that several of these students do not want to be challenged at the cost of their marks. They may exclaim, "Yes, challenge me! I'm bored!" But then they add the disclaimer, "Please don't compromise my 98%." I was one of these students in the past. However, as a teacher, I am supposed to encourage my students to develop new skills in a particular subject. When the student is learning, they often make mistakes. They do not score perfectly. Yet, over time, they increase their competency in the skill. And in the end, I award them the mark ...

A melancholy spirit invades my soul as I ponder the events of the last two weeks. The Flu Fear of the flu is spreading like wild fire. Students are getting ill. Teachers are getting sick. Our school board is running out of substitute teachers. People are furiously rubbing their hands with hand sanitizer. Janitors walk the halls disinfecting door knobs and other commonly touched surfaces. Parents are on their phones inquiring about an ill child at home. And I have been asked by several colleagues, "Did you get your flu shot yet?" It all seems surreal, like I've walked into another world. End of the World People are scared of the future. I have been asked by two students if I believe the world will end in 2012 as predicted by the Mayans centuries ago. I have sat down at lunch to hear two of my colleagues speak of how our planet has entered a downward spiral due to global warming. Apparently, the lives of my children will be difficult. They may enter a struggle for life itse...

This about sums up my day: A frazzled teacher phones what she thinks is the medical imaging clinic. "Hello. My name is __________. I need to book an ultrasound. I'm pregnant." A giggle comes across the receiver. "I'm sorry, you have the wrong number," replies a female voice. "Oh - I'm sooooo sorry. This is ridiculous!" The teacher hangs up and dials the correct number while laughing to herself. What a day.

Sugar-Free, Fat-Free Lately, it's been challenging to find food that is healthy for our family. For example, a lot of yogurt brands claim to be sugar-free and fat-free. But when you take the time to read the label, you discover that while the "fat-free" claim is true, the mixture is loaded with all kinds of unhealthy artificial sweeteners. Why can't the yogurt producers create a brand that is sweetened with fruit juices and is low in fat? I have found one brand called "Little Ones" that is created for toddlers. It is sweetened with fruit juice but it has a 3.25% milk fat content. Not the best for adults. Along the same vein, does anyone know of a decent mint flavoured gum that is NOT loaded with chemical sweeteners? Apparently pregnant women are supposed to stay away from artificial "sugars". Temporary Haidas I do not deny that my taste buds have changed during my pregnancy. However, I do believe this goes beyond that! As of lunch today, I have ea...

Heard a little heartbeat today. Celebrated with a London Fog and puffed wheat cake. Our second bundle of joy will arrive in Spring. Boy or Girl? We do not know, Until that day!

Yesterday, our little family posed at a local studio for our annual pictures (which, by the way, turned out pretty good). As I was finalizing the order with the photographer, my husband and I overheard the following conversation from a couple who was next in line for their pictures. "This is the wrong dress!" the wife hissed. "But I put on the dress that you had laid out," the husband penitently replied has he held his adorable infant daughter. "Where was I when you did that? What was I doing?" she retorted as if she was speaking to a three year old. (Somehow these questions were supposed to enlightened the husband of some error on his part. Apparently she was right.) The husband mumbled something in repentance. Meanwhile, my husband had to walk out of the room with our daughter to avoid reprimanding the woman. "My colleague offered to take their family pictures," our photographer whispered to me, "She knows her ." Apparently our photo...

I've been teaching for two weeks now. And part of me can't believe how easy it has been to get back into the swing of things. I guess when a person has been doing this for 10+ years, it starts to become second nature. However, there are a few things that have caused this educator to shake her head with either annoyance or sadness. None of these are new issues, just old ones that have made a poignant impact after almost a year and a half maternity leave. Teens & Cell Phones Wow. I forgot how many kids walk around in the hallways with their ears or fingers glued to a cell phone. What are they doing? Talking, texting, playing games, taking pictures, etc. It is an epidemic! As well as an addiction for many. And I do shake my head in disgust when a 15 year old is sporting a Blackberry . Come on! Save your hard earned money for something more significant, like an education. So, do you want to know what my answer was to a student who wanted to use their iPhone as a calculator? NO...

During the last week, I graced my workplace for a few hours a day. I cleaned out the clutter left by the previous teacher and started to accomplish the tasks on my ritual "Beginning of the Year" To-Do list. It felt strange to leave my daughter behind in the care of my husband. Don't get me wrong. My husband is absolutely wonderful with our daughter. It just seemed different reversing roles after the last year. Previously, we were fairly traditional in our division of labor. He went to work. I stayed home. He engaged himself in math and science. I immersed myself in domestic duties. He monitored the progress of hundreds of students. I invested time in one child. Now, our lives will be slightly unconventional. I will be the primary breadwinner. He will be the primary caregiver. Our traditional routine was very comfortable and predictable, especially for me. Change and I are not necessarily the best of friends! I'd keep things at status quo if I had the power to manipula...

It was a typical moment in my husband's side of the family. Several of us were gathered around the dining room table. Remnants of the latest game were scattered in the background; sounds of delightful squeals drifted along the mid-summer breeze; and the smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted in from the kitchen. We started to converse about various topics. No agenda. Just whatever. The participants were diverse: men, women, uncles, aunts, nieces, nephews, brothers, sisters, parents, and children. A potpourri of opinions were offered. Encouragement was generously bestowed. And people's diverse views were respected. It was a beautiful and refreshing moment, a moment when the hierarchical structures and gender divisions were erased and people were free to share their thoughts as equals. I struggle with hierarchies and gender norms establish by society on both the micro and macro level. Sometimes such structures or norms give me a sense of comfort. I often take pride in implicitly f...

My husband was "reading" Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs to our daughter earlier this evening. Here is his enhanced version: Once upon a time there was a girl named Snow White and a Queen who had image problems. Snow White would often clean the steps. She seemed to enjoy it. One day the Queen realized that she wasn't the most beautiful woman in the kingdom. Rather, Snow White was the most beautiful. Since she could not handle coming in second, the Queen sent out a hunter to kill Snow White. But he couldn't. He killed an animal instead. Snow White fled for her life and encountered seven little men called the dwarfs. They were happy people, except for Grumpy. Meanwhile, the Queen turned herself into the ugliest woman in the kingdom. Then she killed Snow White with an poisonous apple. [Snow White, having led such a sheltered life away from the real world, accepted the gift without hesitation.] The dwarfs came home early from work and chased the Queen up the mountain w...

Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy with not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. (Hebrews 12:14-15) I had the privilege of witnessing two beautiful wedding ceremonies during the month of July. While the style of each wedding was different, the spirit behind the event was identical. In front of beaming family and friends, two individuals pledged to be faithful to the each other until the end of their days. Furthermore, the witnesses on the stage as well as in the pews were exhorted to support the couples in fulfilling their vows. It brought back wonderful memories of our special day. Yet I ask, in honest sincerity, how do we support couples in fulfilling their vows? Why do I ask? Ever since my husband and I began our marriage only a few years ago, I have encountered several marriages...

My husband. I am very thankful for him. Yes, there are times when our personalities seem to be polar opposites of each other, thereby causing short moments of tension in our lives. Yet, these moments have served to strengthen and refine our individual personalities. By God's grace, we are becoming better people because of knowing each other. Here is a short list of what I have learned from him. Some lessons are profound, others are simple and practical (and a bit funny). 1. When you are adding spaghetti to a pot of boiling water, grasp the dry noodles on both ends and snap them towards the pot. Shorter noodles are easier to cook. Furthermore, snapping the noodles towards the pot allows for splinters to enter the water instead of the surrounding area. 2. If you need to keep score of points during a card game, list the players on your record sheet clockwise in reference to yourself. This increases the efficiency of record keeping. 3. Just because there is silence in answer to a quest...

I really do not desire to be a Twitter participant. However, since these haphazard thoughts are "Twitter-like", I thought the above title was appropriate. 1. Visited Indigo . I was browsing through books at Indigo with my husband. Paused in the baby section. Read a few sections from Unbuttoned: Women Open Up About the Pleasures, Pains, and Politics of Breastfeeding . Almost cried while skimming through one of the chapters. Wish I read this book before I went through my experience. Seems like a balanced view of the issues. 2. Saw green and orange cars . I've noticed something in my drives around the city. Aspen green and burnt orange are the two colors of choice in new cars these days. Dig the green. Not a fan of the orange. Maybe we'll get a snazzy aspen green Toyota Prius when the price of hybrid cars drop in market value. 3. Watched the Gags . My husband was watching Just for Laughs: Gags a few weeks ago. I joined him. A human behaviour caught my attention. Many ...

For the past three months, my esthetician and I have had a little arrangement. I arrive at her home for an eyebrow wax and she hands me the next season of Star Trek: The Next Generation . Her husband has kindly granted us the privilege to methodically view his precious collection of all seven seasons. We are currently in season three. My husband and I are thoroughly enjoying this trip down memory lane. Captain Picard's brilliant leadership is inspirational. Plus his dry wit and brief moments of boyish enthusiasm are a delight to watch. Worf, the Klingon Chief Security Officer, is entertaining as he heroically attempts to tone down his warrior spirit in light of Starfleet diplomacy. And Worf's stoic comments are hilarious! Lieutenant Commander Data - now here is one fine android officer! While his computer-like skills are admired by his comrades, he would trade them away in an instant to become human. True, his reflections on humanity are at times naive, but at other moments hi...

Followers of pop culture reacted in shock when the news rolled in: Michael Jackson found dead at the age of 50. Grocery store airwaves played Jackson tributes all day. Hundreds of copies of Thriller were gobbled up by consumers. Frenzied fans watched their e-mail with anticipation , hoping to receive tickets to the King of Pop's memorial. It all seemed surreal, like a clip from a Hollywood motion picture. Yet the sadness that people are expressing over the lose of a cultural icon seems hollow, especially in light of the last decades of Michael's life. Ugly rumors and condemnations haunted the pop star's world. Who can forget the image of Jackson being escorted by police in his pajamas for accusations of child molestation? Or what about the disturbing video of him precariously dangling an infant over a balcony? These pictures are so divorced from my memories of a vivacious young man moonwalking across a concert stage. The following questions beg to be asked: What is more...

First family vacation: just the three of us. Destination? Bed & Breakfast, lakeside, two hours out of town. Forecast? Rain, rain, rain, And a bit of sunshine. Here's hoping? Packed her cute pink swimsuit Plus several summer clothes. Donned on jeans and bunny hugs instead. It's okay. No splashing in the shallows with baby girl. But she discovered our hosts' beautiful and gentle cats instead. No building sandcastles with her brand new pail and shovel. Yet she ate strawberry ice cream in a "shanted-out" cafe that brought laughter to her parents. No restful nights for Mommy and Daddy as she refused to sleep in a playpen. Instead she snuggled and slept by her Mommy while her Daddy kindly dozed on the couch to make room. It's okay. It's a matter of perspective. It was worth it.

I've been feeling a bit self-conscious. As I observe women flaunting the current fashion trends, I realize I may be going out of style. Truthfully, I find it difficult to keep up with the newest sensations. Extra money to spend on being "in vogue" is a low priority for our household. However, in some areas, I honesty have no desire to be chic or modern. Here is my list: Chunky Brown Sunglasses The sunglasses from the early 70's are back. You know the ones I'm talking about. Big, gogglish, usually brown, and often perched on the top of a woman's head like a hairband. I don't own one. I don't care to. Why? Because this "wearer of glasses" would have to purchase contacts to participate in the current sunglasses craze. Contacts and I don't get along. Believe me, I've tried. Three times. I guess I could invest in some bug-eyed prescription sunglasses? No, not worth the money. The trend will probably disappear in a few years, I hope. Skinny...

...for all my proud, self-righteous blogging moments:

One of my husband's frequently used Hindi words is "undaz" (pronounced un-THE-az), which is best translated as "estimate" or "approximate". He learned the word while he was listening to a conversation between my sister and I. From what I recall, I was recounting a cooking experience and I remarked, "You know, I'm such an 'undaz' girl." My sister nodded in understanding while my husband looked puzzled. "What does undaz mean?" he queried. I chuckled and realized I had slipped a Hindi word into an English sentence without a second thought. My cooking experiences tend to be undaz moments (unlike times of baking where I meticulously follow a recipe to ensure success). In honor of such moments, I will share one of my favorites: Undaz Soup! The absent of specific quantities is intentional. Ingredients leftover roasted chicken, including bones 3 - 5 peeled garlic cloves whole peppercorns bay leaf coarsely chopped onion (or gre...

On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment . But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body , but that its parts should have equal concern for each other . If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is part of it. (1 Corinthians 12:22-27, italics added) Several weeks ago I went for a long overdue massage. My therapist asked, "What side do you carry your daughter on?" "My left side," I answered. "I can tell," she replied, "That side is much more tense in comparison to your right side. You probably carry he...

This YouTube video is dedicated to all my Star Trek: The Next Generation friends out there! Enjoy a good laugh. "Believing oneself to be perfect is often the sign of a delusional mind." ~ Data (First Contact)

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. (Isaiah 43:18-19) "Are you okay?" I asked my husband as I paused my night time reading routine. Usually my husband is enjoying one of the many pieces of literature he has on the go at the same time. This evening he was just lying there, with his arms folded across his chest. "I guess I am having a 'Rain' moment," he chuckled. "A 'Rain' moment," I smiled. "What are you thinking about?" "Humans. All we ever want to do is think about ourselves and how we can make our lives easier," he mused. "Here I am wondering how it would be nice if I was told tomorrow that they made a mistake, there actually is an opening at my school next year, and my position isn't redundant. That would make it easier for me when September rolls around......

If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless. Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you. (James 1:26-27) "Tell me again - why we go to church," my husband pined as we drove home from service. "We go for others," I replied. "It doesn't seem like we go for ourselves anymore. We go so you can encourage [our friends]. We go so I can listen to [a single mom] share about her struggles with her son." "I know..." he responded, "I want [our friends] to know there is someone who understands all the political crap they are going through. If it wasn't for that, I'd stay home and study my Strong's Concordance." I am becoming more and more disillusioned with organized religion. Frustration bubbles to the surface when our rituals become mindless motions of...

A cloud of uncertainty invades The sunny skies of my soul. The path ahead dims. I only view the now, The patch of dirt beneath my feet. I pause from my previous confident stride, Wondering As I aimlessly kick loose pebbles below. Where to go? What to do? How do we get there ? Voices compete for my attention: Good voices, well intentioned voices. I am afraid, Scared of making a mistake on the road ahead. I do not know whose voice to heed. The clouds grow darker, threatening to rain. I proceed with caution, what else can I do? I peer up at the sky, trying to find a glimpse of God's rays. Nothing seems forthcoming. Thus, I wait... Though tears fall from the firmament above. I hope for a new path to be revealed As I take small steps of faith.

A few days ago I stepped into a baby boutique that specialized in organic products that are kinder to the environment. Cloth diapering kits, organic cotton/hemp clothing, and biodegradable products were part of the selection. A "breastfeeding is welcome" sign was proudly displayed on the old-fashioned door. Information about midwifery and doula services was available for costumers to peruse through. Even the architectural structure of the boutique was reminiscent of the early 1900s. Welcome to the baby green shift movement, a movement where we aim to raise our children with a green, organic, environmentally-friendly conscience. I can't help but think that there is a desire amongst several mothers to go back to the way it was. Back in the day, babies were brought into this world in the comfort of the mother's home, without drugs, but with the gentle yet firm coaxing of a midwife. Children were fed organic fare, either compliments of their mother's body or indigenou...

During days when you wonder if God's benevolent eye is truly on you, it is good to be reminded that He does love you. Today I was encouraged by one of my daughter's Toddle Bible Songs. Often the music plays in the background, ignored by my conscious mind. But today, the CD was really speaking to me. I'll share the lyrics of "He Loves Me, Too!" with you. Hope it encourages you as well. God sees the little sparrow fall, It meets His tender view; If God so loves the little birds, I know He loves me, too. He loves me, too, He loves me, too, I know He loves me, too! Because He loves the little things, I know He loves me, too. He paints the lilies in the field, Adds perfume to each bell; If He so loves the little flowers, I know He loves me well. He loves me, too, He loves me, too, I know He loves me, too! Because He loves the little things, I know He loves me, too. God made the little birds and flowers, And all things big and small; He'll not forget His little ones...

As promised, here is my favorite vegetarian recipe! Ingredients 2 x 400 g cans chick peas 2 medium-sized onions, finely chopped 1 tsp grated ginger 1 tsp mashed garlic 1/2 tsp turmeric 3 Tbsp vegetable oil 2 large well ripened tomatoes, chopped 1 Tbsp ground coriander 2 tsp garam masala 2 Tbsp lemon juice 2-3 Tbsp chopped fresh coriander leaves (optional) Method 1. Drain chick peas, reserving the liquid. 2. Cook the onions, ginger, garlic, and turmeric in the oil until soft and golden on high-medium heat. 3. Add the tomatoes and cook to soften. Add coriander and chick peas. Cook for 10 minutes, add 1 cup of the reserved liquid, and cook for an additional 10 minutes. 4. Add garam masala, lemon juice, and stir in the coriander leaves. Lower the heat, and gently cook for 2-3 minutes, adding more liquid (if needed) to make a sauce. 5. Serve with basmati rice and/or naan. Raita (yogurt salad) is also a great accompaniment to this dish. Provides a delicious vegetarian meal for 4-6 people. (R...

I had a chance to hang out with a good friend today. We talked about the challenges and the unexpected joys of trying to live within our means. Both of us are experiencing a decrease in our monthly finances due to different reasons (my maternity benefits ended and we are a single income family). We are trying to find ways to save money. Our social engagements are selected based on their economical value. Two for one dinner coupons, matinee movies, visits to the free art gallery, and walks in the park are great choices. And I am okay with that. Actually, I am relieved. It is comforting to know that someone understands that a dinner at some ritzy restaurant cannot be my entertainment every month. So, in tribute to saving money, I have come up with some new (and old) discoveries on how to live within my means. 1. Create a budget and stick to it. It is amazing what you can learn about your spending habits when you record what you think you should spend on items and compare it to what you...

One of my highlights from this May long weekend was watching Star Trek , the highly anticipated sci-fi prequel of the original Star Trek television series. What an absolutely amazing movie! It took my breath away. Now, I was not a huge fan of Captain Kirk and his adventures around the universe. Star Trek: The Next Generation was more my forte (Captain Picard is by far my favorite Star Trek captain!). But my husband has fond memories of waking up early on Saturday morning to watch Kirk and Spock encounter the paradoxes of the galaxy. Yah, cartoons were cool, but Star Trek was riveting, magical, and entertaining. Riveting, magical, and entertaining are three words that sum up Star Trek , the movie. Is it worth viewing on the big screen with Dolby surround sound? A resounding YES! Don't worry, I will not give away the plot as I share my reasons why. 1. J. J. Abrams directs a movie that Star Trek fans will appreciate and new viewers to the phenomena will enjoy. There is enough refere...

I have been experiencing intermittent dizziness for a couple of months. After a visit to the physiotherapist, I discovered I may have a mild case of motion sensitivity. Cause? A past viral infection, perhaps? Or I'm just getting old. Nonetheless, the treatment is to engage in exercises that purposefully bring on the symptoms. In other words, I need to bob my head up and down several times a day to make myself dizzy. Sounds a bit ridiculous. But apparently, the theory is that the brain will adjust by thinking such motion is normal. I am wondering if such treatment applies when we are mentally losing our balance in life. Even though I try very hard to be balanced, I often feel like I am walking a shaky tight rope between two extremes. I become dizzy in the process. For instance, I want to eat healthy and exercise on a regular basis. But I also desire to stop my mental calorie count once in a while to gorge myself on chocolate cake without the guilt. I aspire to be an environmentally ...