Feeling like Eeyore
I know that my readership has dwindled down to practically nil and I sit here typing thoughts to a devoid audience (anyone out there???). Yet, I wish to document this moment of struggle. My teaching contract with the local school board ended in June. There isn't a place for me in the fall. In a need to reduce operating costs to address government cutbacks in education, the fat was trimmed. Extra teachers are a financial drain on the system. Payroll is a huge cost. Thus my exit. I am processing this change with much less grace than I anticipated. Some days I am incredibly sad and end up blubbering through an entire church service, scared that my mascara is creating raccoon eyes on my face. Other days I am filled with anger and regret, screaming all the "why?" questions in my head while plastering on "It is well with my soul" serenity on my exterior. But things are not well. I could swear a blue streak. I understand that I am grieving. I am grievin...