13 Hours of Rain

Dear God, It is the Eve of a New Year. In this moment, I feel thankful. This year has been intense. You placed me on a steeper-than-usual learning curve over the course of twelve months. Overall, it has been good. Very good. Lonely at times. But full of rich lessons. I started off this year by reading Radical by David Platt, and was convicted of the North American drive to create heaven on earth instead of building the Kingdom of God. The book propelled me to shift my ministry focus from a thriving group of women who excel in investing in our local community to the Missions Committee, a group of two people. Lord, it has been an enlightening (and lonely) experience. Thank you that my husband agreed to partner with me this year. We discovered a wonderful elderly couple on the committee who are dedicated to the exciting work occurring overseas through various Mennonite based organizations. Their zeal for Missions is inspiring! May you continue to bless them. Yet, as I mentione...

Our Family For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. His government and its peace will never end. He will rule with fairness and justice from the throne of his ancestor David for all eternity. The passionate commitment of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies will make this happen! Isaiah 9:6-7 NLT

Dear God, Right now, the world that my children know is safe. The main adults in their life love them. Their basic physical needs of food, water, clothing, and shelter are met in abundance. And the extent of violence they experience is a sibling shoving match over Duplo . I wish life was this simple and serene. Lately, I have been saddened by the recent act of senseless, insane violence against the most vulnerable in our society. At moments, I freeze with fear and tremble, "That could have been my daughter or my son." I hesitate at my overall excitement of letting my first born, my daughter, climb the steps of a castle-type school to experience new horizons of learning. I wonder, "Will she be safe? Will she survive? Who will protect her?" A few nights ago, I read Hansel and Gretel to my daughter. Evil was present in the story through a mean step-mother and wicked children-eating witch (hmmmm, not the best story to read before bedti...

Dear Readers, Check out my 13th and last Family Friday post at Our Journey Home . Thank you for your support. Sincerely, Rain

Cuddling with Little J. Dear Kiddos, One of my favourite experiences in life is walking through a jetway and boarding a plane destined to some faraway location. I still experience kid-like excitement over rolling carry-on baggage behind me, hearing the high pitched whirl of engines, and breathing air tinged with the smell of jet fuel. I smile almost every time! Just a couple of days ago, I returned from a weeklong visit with my sister (your Mausi*) and her family in the States. It was a delight to be airborne once again and even more refreshing to spend some quality time with my sister, her husband, and their three sweet boys. Yes, it was indeed an honour to cuddle the littlest boy, your newest cousin, while he is still an infant. During my time there, many a thought scintillated my psyche. Here are a couple. On Jetways. I really hope that both of you have a chance to travel internationally. I have a dream that someday, 8 - 10 years from now, your Daddy and I...

Dear Children, I was scared into the Kingdom. At the age of six, I sat in church, doodling on my Sunday School papers when the preacher got to me. "You are a sinner." Yup, I'd agree. "You are heading to Hell," came the fiery conclusion.  Uh-oh! Don't want to go there. Thus, THE "Prayer" was said. And right there and then, I was officially "Born-Again." I don't doubt my conversion experience. That moment was life changing for me. My memories of that time are vivid! However, I kind of wish I wasn't scared into believing. The reason for my regret is I think this experience as well as a lot of theology I was taught as a kid contributed to my image of a God hell-bent on punishing His creation. Grace was a foreign concept. Now kids, let me set the record straight. I am not denying that the concept of Hell exists (i.e. separation from God). I just question how it physically looks like. But this post isn't about dissecting the...

Dear Children, Sometimes I wonder how you will turn out, let's say, twenty years from now. Will you be fighting over toys or whacking each other to prove a point? I sincerely hope not! Instead, I earnestly pray that you will HONOR each other. Your Daddy and I are reading a book together entitled, "Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes... in you and your kids!" by Scott Turansky & Joanne Miller. It is a parenting book, one of the few parenting books – wait a minute – the ONLY parenting book that we as your parents are attempting to read together. There are many parenting resources out there, found in numerous self-help aisles, websites, and magazines. And every parenting unit seems to have its own style. Sometimes it can be very overwhelming to figure out WHAT to do! Anyway, last spring one of my friends came to visit me. She brought her four children along. And it was fascinating to see how her kids interacted with each other. There were moments...

Dear Lord, It has been a little over two years since we moved to this geographic location. And while I feel settled for the most part, there is another part of me that feels anxious. I long for authentic connections with others. But first, I must thank you that you have provided me contentment in being a stay-at-home Mom. I wear my job description as a badge of honor and privilege. You have blessed me with two beautiful, energy-packed, normal children – one of each gender – a special gift of grace to my husband and I. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. It is liberating that I don't feel like I need to tout my academic credentials in the face of others, as some stupid way of making myself feel worth it. Now I understand more clearly: I am a Homemaker. That's more than good enough for me. However, I sometimes feel alone in this journey and wish for past days of camaraderie, when I associated with fellow educators of the same faith in a distant land (best two years of m...

Dear Children, I do not know if you have figured out that Friday is "Errand Day" in our household. I drop off your Daddy at school and then both of you and I accomplish some tasks together. Today was such a day. Except for one unfortunate and beautiful moment. With your Daddy heading towards the hallowed halls of learning, I take the wheel and start to drive. I'm tired. My mind is whirling over money issues and how I need to potentially fiddle with funds to repair a water heater and clean our carpets (two unrelated maintenance items, by the way). I press some buttons on the dash to listen to a worship song, a song that might be the closing melody of an anticipated Missions Event. I yawn, while thinking. Then, I see a couple of RCMPs stationed at a school zone speed trap. I stop at the octagonal red sign across from them and make a right turn. A cop car pulls behind me. And the blue and red lights are flashing. "What did I do?" I moaned as I pull over. ...

Dear Children, Canadian Thanksgiving is upon us, and it is here that I desire to impart some lessons I'm learning at this stage in my life. It is my hope and prayer that both of you will be thankful individuals. What I am talking about goes beyond using manners to being truly grateful to God in spite of the circumstances you see yourself in. However, before I unpack this idea, let me share your recent thankfulness lists as described by yourself! My daughter, you are thankful to God for: Sun Clouds Books Doctors Bags Toy Hammer Bibles Pictures Spring House My son, you are thankful to God for: Frogs Giraffes Cows Trees Daddy Fan Clock Books Mommy Your sister I find it fascinating how your lists are different, except for "Books", which you both enjoy thoroughly. A., your list focuses on elements of nature, such as sun, clouds, and the season of Spring. You also appreciate doctors, especially since you are recovering from an injured wrist. I ...

Dear Daughter, Your Daddy discovered my desire to be a stay-at-home-Mom the first time he met me. It was a blind date set up by mutual friends. There we sat in a typical “bar & grill” restaurant eating standard North American cuisine. Our conversation turned to reminiscing about our childhood days. Both your Daddy and I spoke of how we benefited from Mothers who sacrificed careers to parent their children full-time. After our disclosures, my friend asked me right in front of your Daddy, “Is that what you want to be one day, a stay-at-home-Mom?” “Yes,” I firmly responded. Forward time to about 7.5 years later, where I am here, at home, with you and your brother. I recently resigned a permanent teaching contract with a highly sought over school board to follow your Daddy to a smaller community to (1) support his professional career and to (2) stay home full-time. Has it been worth it? “Yes,” I emphatically state. But it is not easy. Oh no. There are days when I want to scream i...

This is your last chance folks! Last chance to comment on this blog. No, I'm not ending it. Not yet, anyway. But, I'm partially changing the purpose of my blog from its original intent. Almost four years ago I wrote: "...connecting with people in real time and space is not always a reality. Therefore, I need a space for my reflections, albeit virtual. I need a potential readership for my authorship, even if this 'paperback' collects dust on a used book rack. I need a framework to be intellectual, especially since my day consists of using simple sentences when talking to my beautiful baby daughter (and it is a delight to talk to her!). And yes, sometimes, I NEED to be alone..." I started this blog as a framework for intellectual stimulation and introspective reflections. And even though I acknowledged that these words would be read by a choice few, I now realize that I've desired more kudos from this space than is realistic to expect. After all, ...

We are starting preschool in our home. No, not outside-of-our-home classes, but rather inside-our-house-with-Mommy lessons. Today we are going to make soup, lentil pea soup that is. Admittedly, my children are not extremely fond of these legumes. But in this part of the prairies, we grow lentils and peas, amongst other things. And in the county of my ethnicity, we eat a lot of this source of complex carbohydrates, folic acid, and vegetable protein (or dal ). Two good reasons to adopt more dal into my repertoire of cooking! Thus, our soup journey started with a trip to the Bulk Barn (my new favourite store). We perused the aisles, rushed past the candy (or I did), and lingered in the health food section. We collected little bags of yellow and green split peas to add to our lentils at home. Today we will attempt this recipe*: 1 tbsp olive oil 1/2 large onion, diced 1 stalk of celery, sliced 1 medium carrot, diced 2 garlic cloves, crushed 1/2 tsp cumin p...

While the Autumnal Equinox is still days away, the Fall season has begun where I live. The nights are cool and crisp, leaves are embracing colors other than green, and children (along with teachers, of course) are loading backpacks with back-to-school treasures. And I am thankful. There is something comforting about routine. While I enjoy the leisurely pace of long summer days combined with all the natural blessings of being outside, I equally appreciate Autumn when I divert my attention to formally and intentionally educating my children during their stage of preschool. In our household, we have seasonal menus. It isn't anything official, but rather the way I tend to cook. As soon as it is warm enough to sit outside (usually mid-May), our summer menu begins. Our family BBQs (or grills) as much as possible. I rarely use my oven unless I am baking muffins or cookies. For instance, yesterday we prepared Tandoori Chicken Skewers for visiting family and tonight we a...

It has been a good summer. But busy. Actually, too busy. Strangely enough, I am looking forward to the start of school, when I can find solace in routine. Truthfully, I feel parched. My soul feels parched, just like the dry, prairie grasses that surround our community. I know what I need. Time. Time alone. Time alone for more than a morning. Time alone outside my house and yard. Time alone away from my responsibilities and my family. Time. With. God. I love to entertain. I thoroughly enjoy planning menus, events, and experiences that cater to my guests' interests and needs. And this summer we were blessed with many friends and family who graced our home with their presence. During the year, I can't help myself in inviting people over for a meal or a play date with my children. After all, I desire our home to be a place where people can drop in for a visit and re-energize their spirit. Thus, I am delighted when people do just that. Our spare bedroom has been well used by m...

Lately, I started to track my calorie intake. It's not because I desire to be thinner per se . I just need to loose the stubborn amount of weight I've gained from indulging in too much good food and delectable desserts during my holidays. Plus, it is a great way to be reminded of healthier food choices and smaller portion sizes. However, there are moments when temptations arise and I want to snitch something unnecessary. While I am not as hard on myself as in the past, my mind often cautions me with these words, "Stop while you are ahead." What do I mean by this? Well, it is just my reminder to stop before I overstretch myself and overload on unnecessary weight-gaining calories. Usually my self-talk works and I stop. Now this post isn't about weight loss. Rather, it is about the ongoing process that I am experiencing in letting go of my children's infant years and moving on to embrace the years to come. Honestly, that last few months have been challenging ...

Coming back from our holidays was difficult. Our time away was lovely and chaotic: lovely in the sense it was  wonderful to connect with family, chaotic in the sense that it can be a  challenge traveling with two energetic preschoolers. Then we returned home and WHAM-O, all the reminders of our home improvement projects hit us SMACK-DAB in the face. Oh boy. All I wanted was time to r-e-l-a-x. We've been back for about two weeks now. And in that time frame, projects have been shelved for the sake of health. Kitchen refacing dreams are on next year's list, again . Dining room painting may happen before winter, if we're lucky (and I, the painter, get motivated). Garden beds for Spring 2013 might be built if we ever find a way to secure some cedar in this town. In the meanwhile, we are focusing on minor touch-ups/repairs, which is enough work in itself. So, why is this blog-worth? Well, I believe I am learning some lessons through the process, compliments of friends and...

Here are some of my favourite pictures from July...  Southern Prairie Gem Cousins Reunited Celebrating Us Her Sunday Best His Sunday Best Overcoming Fear of Horses My Day Lily

Peace Country It is hard to believe that it is the second half of July. We have enjoyed our summer thus far as we reconnect with family in various locations. We've been celebrating milestones, marveling at God's creation, and eating far too much good food (Operation August Slim Down here I come!). We've had many thought provoking discussions with loved ones. And, boy, we've played a lot of board games! But my introvert nature is starting to kick in. I feel I need time to process the many thoughts that are churning within. Here is a snap shot of my contemplations: Coming of Age. It was wonderful to reconnect with my younger sister and her family this summer. Truthfully, it has been challenging to stay meaningfully connected due to the physical distance that separates us and our very intense life as mothers of preschoolers. Thus, spending some concentrated time together was beneficial in strengthening our relationship. And you know what I've noticed? My siste...

3 What do people get for all their hard work under the sun? 4 Generations come and generations go, but the earth never changes. 5 The sun rises and the sun sets, then hurries around to rise again. 6 The wind blows south, and then turns north. Around and around it goes, blowing in circles. 7 Rivers run into the sea, but the sea is never full. Then the water returns again to the rivers and flows out again to the sea. 8 Everything is wearisome beyond description. No matter how much we see, we are never satisfied. No matter how much we hear, we are not content. 9 History merely repeats itself. It has all been done before. Nothing under the sun is truly new. 10 Sometimes people say, “Here is something new!” But actually it is old; nothing is ever truly new. 11 We don’t remember what happened in the past, and in future generations, no one will remember what we are doing now. ~ Ecclesiastes 1 There are days when I wonder what is the point. Really. What is the point of doing the futile tas...

It began with a lemonade stand at a friend's garage sale. Much to my disappointment, only a few quarters were collected from the sales. Apparently two cute kids was not enough to tempt more adults to enjoy a cool citrus refreshment. Regardless, my daughter brought her little treasure home. I added more quarters to the sale and laid out ten coins in front of her. "How much of this should we give to Jesus?" I asked. She studies the shiny caribous on the table and sets aside four. "Good for you! You are being quite generous!" Wow, giving 40% of her income away! I thought. Should I advise her to only give just the minimum 10%? Or a more risky 20%? Hmmmm... I decide to let her take the lead and move on to my explanation, "When we give to Jesus, we are giving to places like the church. Or we use the money to help the poor. Or we send money to our Compassion child. What are some ways you can give to Jesus?" "I could give it to MOPS," she o...

Over the past two years, I have encountered several situations in which I have had to be totally honest with friends, family, and colleagues. It's been difficult and liberating. There is something freeing about being truthful, even if it results in hurt feelings. Though, I am not sure why I have experienced so many consecutive moments where truth needed to be disclosed... Maybe God is challenging me in my misplaced need to please others? Maybe His desire for me is to be true to who I am instead conforming to what I think others want me to be? Nonetheless, here are the lessons I have learned (and continue to learn) while relying on God's courage to be real, authentic, and honest in my dealings with others. When a negative pattern continues to emerge in a relationship or working environment, approach the person who directly offended you and express your true feelings. It may help to place your concerns on paper before talking to others. Often, most problems are due to mis...

Her Younger Brother "Who is your best friend?" I ask my daughter. "My brother," she concludes. "That's wonderful! I am glad you consider your brother your best friend. Remember, you only have one brother. He is your friend for life." The little girl ponders for a moment. "You know M. and A.? They have two kids too." "Yes, you are right," I nod. "But the people across the street  – they have five bucha !" she exclaims. I smile to hear a rare Hindi word thrown into an English sentence. "Yes, they have five children." My daughter pauses for a moment. I can almost see the wheels turning in her head. "They should give some away," she surmises. I burst out laughing. I find it beautiful how my daughter is content about the make-up of her family. Our composition is what she knows: Daddy, Mommy, Sister and Brother. She really hasn't asked for another sibling. And she completely underst...

I have a quasi-hobby called budgeting. At the end of the month, I get a little giddy {and a bit nervous}. I pull out my laptop, open up my color-coded Excel document, and start punching in digits... Please join me at Our Journey Home for my monthly contribution to Family Friday . Your support is appreciated!

Do you really know what is going in my life? Do you? Do you know what made me cry recently? Do you know who made me smile today? Do you know what caused me frustration and anger a few days ago? Do you know what secret dreams of mine are being fulfilled? Do you? Probably not. But can I answer these questions about the dear people I call my family and friends? Can I put words to these queries in reference to you, my twelve or so readers out there amongst billions (thanks for being the precious few who do stop by). I wish I could say a resounding YES. But, I can't. Oh, I know, I could join Facebook and at least read the mostly surface status lines of my "friends". But would that enlighten me about what is going on in the recesses of your mind, the depths of your heart, and the secret rooms of your soul? I doubt it. But then again, do I even have a right to know? (And sadly, do I really want to know?) There are days I ache to meet with each of the individuals I ha...

Mother's Day 2012 During moments of nostalgia, I find myself disclosing my sadness over the passing of my children's infant years to other mothers. And often the response is, "Well, have another one." (sigh) I am surrounded by many amazing moms in this community. But in my circle of acquaintances, I am not the norm. I am a mother of two. In this small urban city, it seems like three children is the magical family size. But then again, most of the parents of these families are much younger than us. I apologize for blogging about this topic again. But I need to process the end. And if you read on, thank you for supporting me, even though it is virtually at this moment. So, why not Child #3? First, I don't want to add another biological member to our family for the sake of competition. I have been tempted, oh-so-very-much-pressured, to somehow bandage my parental inadequacies by birthing more babies. After all, amazing moms have more kids...