Honestly

Over the past two years, I have encountered several situations in which I have had to be totally honest with friends, family, and colleagues. It's been difficult and liberating. There is something freeing about being truthful, even if it results in hurt feelings. Though, I am not sure why I have experienced so many consecutive moments where truth needed to be disclosed... Maybe God is challenging me in my misplaced need to please others? Maybe His desire for me is to be true to who I am instead conforming to what I think others want me to be? Nonetheless, here are the lessons I have learned (and continue to learn) while relying on God's courage to be real, authentic, and honest in my dealings with others.
  1. When a negative pattern continues to emerge in a relationship or working environment, approach the person who directly offended you and express your true feelings. It may help to place your concerns on paper before talking to others. Often, most problems are due to miscommunication rather than purposeful behaviour. Remember, it is counterproductive to gossip about the person behind his or her back. Be courageous, and talk face to face.
  2. Work hard at reconciliation when disagreements arise. Offer options to keep the communication going. However, if an impasse results and the opposing party chooses to abandon the relationship in spite of your efforts, let him or her go.
  3. Learn to confess your "secret sins" to those you consider nearest and dearest to you. It may lead to revealing conversations about your own faults and your own areas of blindness. While nobody enjoys being corrected, we need Godly discipline to grow. After all, we learn the most from our mistakes, right?
  4. Be true to yourself, your circumstances, and your beliefs/values. Do not try to do things solely to impress others or to bandage your personal insecurities. Rather, embrace who you are and hold fast to your convictions.
  5. Do not overstretch your financial means out of guilt (which is different from healthy conviction) or due to negative peer pressure. If you don't have enough money to spend on extra entertainment or unnecessary/frivolous purchases, admit it. Your true friends will understand.
Many lessons to learn! So, is honesty the best policy? What other lessons have you learned? Tell me what you think!

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