A Chance at Valor

Aragorn: "What do you fear my lady?"

Éowyn: "A cage. To stay behind bars until use and old age accept them and all chance of valor has gone beyond recall or desire."

I woke up one morning and realized for the first time in my life that I am ashamed to quote my age. I have joined the rank of women who look back at their yesteryears with a hint of nostalgia. Youth and vitality seem like a lost dream. And it doesn't really help when my doctor has advised me to add vitamin supplements to my diet.

Aging. Why does it scare me so? Éowyn, a shield maiden of Rohan in the Lord of the Rings novels provides me the answer. I fear a cage. I fear feeling trapped. I fear being without inspiration. I fear accepting the status quo. I fear being barred from my dreams by my age. Yet, sometimes my dreams seem uncertain.

The trumpets sounded. The horses reared and neighed. Spear clashed on shield. Then the king raised his hand, and with a rush like the sudden onset of a great wind the last host of Rohan rode thundering into the West. Far over the plain Éowyn saw the glitter of their spears, as she stood still, alone before the doors of the silent house.

Uncertainty. I am learning to embrace the unknown in my life. Maybe it is a good thing that I am getting older. Maybe I need to let go of the dreams I have accomplished in the past and be open to the new dreams that God wishes to impress upon my soul. Maybe I still have a chance at valor. Maybe, like Éowyn, I am standing before my silent house unbeknownst to my participation in an epic battle ahead.

Or, maybe not. Only God knows.

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