Clipped Down to Yellow
Whatever happened to saying "I'm sorry" and really meaning it? Now, I'm not talking about the Canadian style of apologizing, the one we are internationally know for, where we apologize for bumping into someone at the check-out line. Or the type of sorry that we say to empathize with another person's problem. I'm talking about a truly authentic sorry, the one that admits, "I screwed up. I was wrong. I need to change."
A couple of weeks ago, you, my daughter, clipped down to yellow. Your teacher has a behaviour chart in her room, where every child's name is written on a clothes pin and clipped to a range of colors. Everyone starts at green at the beginning of the day, meaning each kid is "ready to learn". As the day progresses, a clip can be moved up or down, depending on what a child does. If a child does something exceptional, he can be clipped up to blue, purple or pink. If a child does something inappropriate, her clip moves down to yellow, orange or red (where red is parent/teacher -- possibly principal -- contact). At the end of the day, each student is responsible for coloring in today's date on his or her homework calendar. The color selected corresponds with the clip location. It's a brilliant idea!
Anyway, you colored in yellow one day and had the foresight to inform me right away after school. You explained the situation that resulted in the consequence. It was a fairly minor incident and I wasn't upset. But I asked you, "Did you apologize to your teacher?" Your answer was no, and then you progressed to explain to me how you didn't want to apologize as that was hard to do and no one else seemed to go to the lengths to say "I'm sorry." Tears where shed by you and everything became a bit dramatic. You calmed down and we talked again. I tried my best to explain reconciliation for Grade 1's.
"When we apologize, we are acknowledging that we did something wrong. And even if it isn't completely our fault, we are apologizing for the hurt the action may have caused someone else. We also ask for God's forgiveness, and He will freely give it. We ask Him to help us change. And we embrace grace, letting go of guilt." I conclude my explanation with a question, "So, what are you sorry for?"
"For being clipped down to yellow?"
"No! You should not be sorry for being caught. That is not really being sorry. What did you do wrong?" You responded correctly and settled for writing an apology note to your teacher.
A few days ago I was returning faulty Christmas lights to the local department store (yes, I finally took the Christmas tree down). Both of you started doing acrobats around the metal line-up rails near the customer service till. I was sort of paying attention to you, but also concentrating on entering my PIN number for the return. The cashier kindly reprimanded you kids and you obeyed immediately. And then I asked you two to apologize. So you did. The cashier exclaimed, "I have never had anyone apologize to me after I have told them not to do that."
Wow.
Kids, I desire for you to be quick to apologize with sincerity. I don't want you to be flippant about saying sorry. But neither do I want you to be wracked with guilt over doing something wrong, especially after you have asked for forgiveness from God and humankind. I hope that you will walk confidently through life knowing you are a sinner saved by grace, a broken individual who has Christ living inside of you. May we be a people of reconciliation, who ask for forgiveness, accept forgiveness and freely offer forgiveness to others.
A couple of weeks ago, you, my daughter, clipped down to yellow. Your teacher has a behaviour chart in her room, where every child's name is written on a clothes pin and clipped to a range of colors. Everyone starts at green at the beginning of the day, meaning each kid is "ready to learn". As the day progresses, a clip can be moved up or down, depending on what a child does. If a child does something exceptional, he can be clipped up to blue, purple or pink. If a child does something inappropriate, her clip moves down to yellow, orange or red (where red is parent/teacher -- possibly principal -- contact). At the end of the day, each student is responsible for coloring in today's date on his or her homework calendar. The color selected corresponds with the clip location. It's a brilliant idea!
Anyway, you colored in yellow one day and had the foresight to inform me right away after school. You explained the situation that resulted in the consequence. It was a fairly minor incident and I wasn't upset. But I asked you, "Did you apologize to your teacher?" Your answer was no, and then you progressed to explain to me how you didn't want to apologize as that was hard to do and no one else seemed to go to the lengths to say "I'm sorry." Tears where shed by you and everything became a bit dramatic. You calmed down and we talked again. I tried my best to explain reconciliation for Grade 1's.
"When we apologize, we are acknowledging that we did something wrong. And even if it isn't completely our fault, we are apologizing for the hurt the action may have caused someone else. We also ask for God's forgiveness, and He will freely give it. We ask Him to help us change. And we embrace grace, letting go of guilt." I conclude my explanation with a question, "So, what are you sorry for?"
"For being clipped down to yellow?"
"No! You should not be sorry for being caught. That is not really being sorry. What did you do wrong?" You responded correctly and settled for writing an apology note to your teacher.
A few days ago I was returning faulty Christmas lights to the local department store (yes, I finally took the Christmas tree down). Both of you started doing acrobats around the metal line-up rails near the customer service till. I was sort of paying attention to you, but also concentrating on entering my PIN number for the return. The cashier kindly reprimanded you kids and you obeyed immediately. And then I asked you two to apologize. So you did. The cashier exclaimed, "I have never had anyone apologize to me after I have told them not to do that."
Wow.
Kids, I desire for you to be quick to apologize with sincerity. I don't want you to be flippant about saying sorry. But neither do I want you to be wracked with guilt over doing something wrong, especially after you have asked for forgiveness from God and humankind. I hope that you will walk confidently through life knowing you are a sinner saved by grace, a broken individual who has Christ living inside of you. May we be a people of reconciliation, who ask for forgiveness, accept forgiveness and freely offer forgiveness to others.