Homemaker

The planet has rotated. The sun is on the other side. My children are dreaming. My husband is reading himself to sleep. I'm here, unable to rest though my body is exhausted. My mind is cluttered with myriad of thoughts. Oh how I wish I could THINK this blog post into existence.

Homemaker. That is what I am. That is what I am supposed to be. What does that mean? As I step back and reflect on the last month in this new residence, I confess that my focus on homemaking has been superficial. For instance, I look around this place and I see things that need to be changed, fixed or renovated. At times my thoughts are obsessed with "getting it right" to the extent that I hesitate to open my home to non-family members because of mild embarrassment. I can already envision my apology to guests, "Sorry about this paint color, I will change it some day..." In addition, there are unpacked boxes everywhere. I get frustrated when I am only able to put a box or two away each day. "I can't get anything done with these two kids!" I've said in exasperation. Also, I silently complain to myself almost every night when I wash the dishes by hand since our dishwasher installation has been delayed, again (long story!). And I catch myself envying my husband as he engages in professional dialogue with colleagues. I miss the "edu-speak", thus I make up for it by spouting out unnecessary advice to my husband (sorry my love).

I moved here to embrace a life of homemaking and I am not doing a really good job at it...

Here is a little bit of what I desire. My home will be a place of PEACE. Yes, chaos will reign at times. Little children (and adults) will shed tears for many reasons. And toys will be scattered everywhere. But, God's PEACE will fill each room. I pray that I will be an instrument of this peace through my words and actions. It is my sincere hope that when someone enters our home, they will sense a beautiful calmness, even though things appear stormy!

My home will be a place of LAUGHTER. Life is too short to take it seriously all the time! I need to reflect on my day and ask myself, "Did I laugh today? Did I laugh with my children? Did my husband and I laugh together?" If not, something needs to change tomorrow.

There is so much more I desire, but I need to sleep! Tomorrow, I want to wake up with a new fervor for homemaking. May I live beyond viewing the fix-it jobs and scattered boxes as hindrances to enjoying my beautiful home with family, friends, and strangers. May I cherish my children, especially my little boy who is growing up way too fast (he is really rolling now, watch out world, here he comes!). May I pray for others while I scrub pots and pans instead of muttering complaints under my breath. And may I encourage my husband in his profession by listening. May I be a homemaker, in the truest sense.

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